And if Langston is right...?

I would like to begin by saying that I love my Mom. Have you told people in your life that you love them lately? I love my life, and the people in it... and you know what. I truly love LA/Pasadena too. Who would've seen that one comin, huh? So, it's official. Everyone gets hugs from me today... and I mean real hugs. Not those weak sauce pat you on the back ones, or side hugs... no, not from me. You, mon amie, will get a solid squeeze.

In other news, I would like to take a moment of silence for my xanga account going off the public radar. Xanga will now be my personal, private blog ;) People keep asking me, what's your g-blog gonna be about?? So here's an answer. It's a blog about life, love, food, wine, sex, passion, politics, technology, colons, health, money, living, breathing, making mistakes, growing, life lessons, art, music, culture, travel, humanity, humility, the philosophy of the Simpsons... from the perspective of a 25-year old (i'm more than just a number, but I'll keep it simple). It's about viewing the world as I see it... about my interests... about the essence of who I am. No doubt, I will be wrong, vulgar, corny, and downright ridiculous at times... but hey, "take me as I am... who I was meant to be. And if you give a damn, take me baby, or leave me..."

...but if you get bored, feel free to read my old school public postings from 2002-2006. Although sporadic on the postings, there is enough to keep you amused for maybe two hours. I think you'll find a different person those pages in some ways. www.xanga.com/hookdonaesthetix. Peace out xanga... I'm now a true playa in the game of google monopoly. Can I be the pimped out top hat?

Now, let's get to the meat of this cow.... These past few days have been a brain drain. So much to process, so little time. I have to make one of the toughest decisions I've ever had to make. Tell me, how much money would it take to convince you to put your dreams on hold? What if that money could help you follow your dreams later? I need to take a plunge in one direction, and I have to decide soon. What will happen to MY dream deferred? I don't want it to dry up like a raisin in the sun. Tell me it ain't so Mister Hughes... tell me it ain't so... I've decided to stay in SoCal for a little longer to better assess my options. Not moving to the Bay as soon as I thought is slightly disappointing, but I made this decision to stay for now because it is what I truly want. Home will always be there, but opportunity to venture comes and goes. How damn fortunate am I to have options, and wonderful ones for that matter? Whoever god is, s/he loves me... that, I know for sure. So, WWYD? No, not yoda... YOU... what would you do? Defer your dreams and make good money in LA, or struggle so that you can live out your dreams in the Bay? Basically, should I be a realist or an idealist at this point in my life? Make the argument... I'm all ears, eyes... head, shoulders, knees, and toes.

Lastly... because I find sexuality incredibly fascinating, I have to tell you about this news article I read yesterday. Pastor Haggard admitted he had sexual relations with yet another man, and he claimed the prostitute he paid for only gave him massages... oh, and Bill Clinton didn't inhale. PH said he is "heterosexual with complications" and is currently seeking counseling for his urges. I'm not one to define sexual preference, but I mean, clearly, this man isn't heterosexual... whatever that means anyway. Ultimately, it's sad to see that he will never be able to come out clean, thus finishing out the rest of his life fighting these natural desires... sucking cock. I'm def no man-hater, but I shuttered just a little when writing that line... yet again reinforcing that indeed, I am a lesbian. Glad we've cleared that one up