Wednesday, March 25, 2009

My first letter to god...


Dear god,

I used to think you hated me for being gay, but after shaking off my comatose state from eating a quarter wheel of cheese, it dawned on me that you are actually upset with me for being a gluttonous pig. I will try my best to cut down my cheese, chocolate, and cookie intake....

Much love and respect,
nancyd

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

bust a left on the corner of heart and rhymes

...and there you will find my soul chillin... with a joint ;) So I will be posting poems sporadically, and what better way to start than with one of my all-time favorites, Pablo Neruda. Regardless of the numerous times I've read and recited this poem, it still moves me to this day.

Puedo Escribir

Puedo escribir los versos más tristes esta noche.
Escribir, por ejemplo: "La noche está estrellada,
y tiritan, azules, los astros, a lo lejos."
El viento de la noche gira en el cielo y canta.

Puedo escribir los versos más tristes esta noche.
Yo la quise, y a veces ella también me quiso.
En las noches como esta la tuve entre mis brazos.
La besé tantas veces bajo el cielo infinito.

Ella me quiso, a veces yo también la quería.
Cómo no haber amado sus grandes ojos fijos.

Puedo escribir los versos más tristes esta noche.
Pensar que no la tengo. Sentir que la he perdido.

Oir la noche inmensa, más inmensa sin ella.
Y el verso cae al alma como al pasto el rocío.

Qué importa que mi amor no pudiera guardarla.
La noche esta estrellada y ella no está conmigo.

Eso es todo. A lo lejos alguien canta. A lo lejos.
Mi alma no se contenta con haberla perdido.

Como para acercarla mi mirada la busca.
Mi corazón la busca, y ella no está conmigo.

La misma noche que hace blanquear los mismos árboles.
Nosotros, los de entonces, ya no somos los mismos.

Ya no la quiero, es cierto, pero cuánto la quise.
Mi voz buscaba el viento para tocar su oído.

De otro. Será de otro. Como antes de mis besos.
Su voz, su cuerpo claro. Sus ojos infinitos.

Ya no la quiero, es cierto, pero tal vez la quiero.
Es tan corto el amor, y es tan largo el olvido.

Porque en noches como esta la tuve entre mis brazos,
mi alma no se contenta con haberla perdido.

Aunque este sea el ultimo dolor que ella me causa,
y estos sean los ultimos versos que yo le escribo.

And translated...

Tonight I Can Write

Tonight, I can write the saddest lines.
Write, for example, "the night is starry
and the blue stars shiver in the distance."
The night wind revolves in the sky and sings.

Tonight, I can write the saddest lines,
I loved her, and sometimes she loved me, too.
Through nights like this one, I held her in my arms.
I kissed her again and again under the endless sky.

She loved me, sometimes, I loved her too.
how could one not love her great still eyes?

Tonight, I can write the saddest lines,
To think that I do not have her, too feel that I have lost her.

To hear the immense night still more immense without her,
And the verse falls to the soul like dew to the pasture.

What does it matter that my love could not keep her.
The night is starry and she is not with me.

this is all. In the distance, someone is singing.
My soul is not satisfied that it has lost her.

My sight tries to find her as though to bring her closer
My heart looks fort her, and she is not with me.

The same night, whitening the same trees,
We, of that time, are no longer the same.

I no longer love her, that’s certain, but how I loved her,
My voice tried to find the wind to touch her hearing.

Another’s. She will be another’s, as she was before my kisses.
Her voice, her bright body, her infinite eyes.

I no longer love her, that’s certain, but maybe I love her.
Love is so short; forgetting is long.

Because through nights like this one, I held her in my arms
My soul is not satisfied that it has lost her.

though this be the last pain that she makes me suffer
And these be the last verses that I write for her.


The English translation does it no justice, but it's still a beautiful poem, ain't it?

Saturday, March 7, 2009

I am home...

Today is my first official full day as a San Franciscan, and I decided to go cheer on my former love, Cal rugby, on Treasure Island. I miss playing the game, and watching them play brought back good memories of tackling, slipping, and sliding all over the muddy fields on T.I. When I was still playing for Cal, I always told myself I would stop along the road from a game on T.I. to check out the beautiful view of the SF Bay. Of course, I never did follow through... Their game just ended, so right now I am sitting along the side of the road on treasure island, enjoying the view, and awing over my new home... and the beginning of my new life.

Life is so damn beautiful...

Friday, March 6, 2009

it's a beautiful morning in socal, and i'm leaving... is it just me or does this feel wrong?

Been awake for 24 hours (with only 3 hours of sleep the night before and a hangover), but there hasn't been time to rest at all. I've been on the move all freaken day. Just to give you an idea of my crazy day:

I met up with five different people and spent a significant time with each
(at least 1.5 hours for every one of them)
I went on a quick two-mile run (who the hell knows why)
Had two business meetings for my gigs in SF
Wrote thoughtful thank you cards
Filled up the gas tank, and checked my oil and tire pressure
Scarfed down three meals somehow
Stopped by POP one last time
Recycled all my stuff at Cal Tech (the recycling center was closed since it was 3AM so I jumped the fence and lost a huge chunk of my skin... yes, I believe in recycling THAT much)
Finished packing
Cleaned my space
Loaded my car
Watched the sunrise from my window one last time...


Sat on my awesome balcony one last time...

See ya later socal... this is not goodbye
Hello SF... hope to see ya soon internet...

Monday, March 2, 2009

Video Blog - Episode 1

I am finally posting my video blog. My apologies for the delay. My internet has been down for the past 6 hours :( I'm nervous for ya'll to watch this, and I'd like to note how attractive I look in this screen shot. It took me a good 30 minutes to get the balls to press the 'post' button, and a good month prior to convince myself that I had to do this particular video blog first. Turn off the side bar music and enjoy EPISODE 1




So yes, I am pretty damn embarrassed now that I've put myself out there. To me, it really is comparable to being naked. I'm still a newbie so cut me some slack! If you want to know the chords I used for this song (John Legend - Everybody Knows), hit me up.

Anyway, let me know what you think, where I can improve, or what song you want me to play next. Do I talk too much?? Whatever you do or think, please comment on my page people. I've had almost 200 hits on my page within one month, and hardly any feedback. How am I supposed to entertain you if I don't know what you want?! Epi 2 will DEF be a food and wine blog. This past weekend was Kristin's birthday, and I had the honor of trying Krug. It was an unforgettable moment in time, and I stood there for a good 10 minutes taking in all the complex layers of this beautifully produced Champagne. Damn, I have a good life and wonderful friends, don't I?

Sunday, March 1, 2009

Comin very soon....

So I recorded my first video blog, but I won't have time to post it until later tonight/tomorrow morning. Get ready... it's pretty entertaining if I may say so myself... you'll see why ;)